Session 4: “Feeling” isn’t a Four-Letter Word
Steven M. Smith
Some people think feelings don’t belong in the workplace. They believe rationality is the best approach to solving all problems.
Regardless of what people would like to think, people don’t stop having feelings and emotions just because they are at work. Feelings are facts. When managed properly, they become an asset to solving problems.
However, when feelings are ignored, they are the biggest barrier to successfully problem solving. For instance, if you carelessly interrupt Leonordo in mid-sentence and switch subjects without regard for him or what he is saying, he will become angry. Others who are treated the same way may feel hurt and just stop contributing.
In Leonordo’s case, he becomes embarrassed about his anger. He tells you neither about his anger nor his embarrassment. He sulks and plots his revenge. When he does exact his revenge in an ensuing conversation, he disguises his feelings as pure rationality. You argue with him over facts that you don’t know about so you go round and round working on a problem you can’t solve.
We will use simulations and group discussions to explore feelings and questions like: How can people who prefer using their feelings to solve problems work better with people who have other preferences? How can people who prefer pure rationality work better with people who don’t? How can we transform feelings so that they aren’t barriers to successful problem solving?
This session will be equally valuable to managers and individual contributors, anyone who has feelings or works with people who have feelings.
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