BuddyBit

When you flip the Buddy Bit on someone, you decide that they're your buddy - a person you are closer to than the average bozo on the street.

So, what causes you to flip the Buddy Bit on someone? To flip it back? - JerryWeinberg 2003.05.31

Since I'm introverted, this happens often. I prefer fewer, closer relationships over many shallower ones. I often buddy with someone who is amenable to casual "second pair of eyes" exchanges, or with people who sincerely want (or provide) mentoring in some skill or skills.

--BobLee 2003.05.31

I've been blessed in life. I have a lot of Buddies, warm relationships built up over time and experience. (I'm an extreme introvert.) I seem to give my Buddies more slack. I allow for more mistakes and misunderstandings (and corrections) in our relationship than I probably would with someone I didn't know as well.

There are times when I've met somebody and have felt immediately attracted, and I've learned to be cautious when this happens. Such an attraction is about me, not them, and is usually based on some experience from my past. Since I'm not all "here, now, with this person", I can find myself excusing, or not noticing, cues that something is going wrong in the relationship.

--Sue Petersen 2003.06.01

Sometimes I flip the Buddy Bit when I have a long conversation with someone in which we lose track of time and talk about things that seem sorta familiar and sorta new.

Sometimes it's because I laugh a lot when I'm with the person.

Sometimes I don't know why it happens. In many cases, "flip" isn't the right word, because the Buddy Bit comes on slowly over time.

I can't think of a time I've flipped the Buddy Bit off. Sometimes I slowly drift away from regular contact with people. I don't know if the Buddy Bit is off in those cases. It feels as if it's just less brightly on.

I've flipped the Romance Bit off a few times, but that's a different bit.

--DaleEmery 2003.06.01

I set the buddy bit after I find out we are simpatico. However, how I figure that out, I haven't a clue. I know it isn't age, nor is it profession, nor even hobbies.

--CharlesAdams 2003.06.02

For me the buddy bit is set when trust is established. That can happen many ways. It is more than simpatico, more than attraction. Dale's description is probably closest to mine - it happens over time and it happens when I realize that time with that person seems oddly magical. I can make friends easily, but a buddy bit is not just friendship in my way of thinking.

So, the follow up question: Is a buddy bit another way of acknowledging congruent communication?

BeckyWinant 2003.06.02

Updated: Monday, June 2, 2003